Devo Records

A Poem

By Juleigh Howard-Hobson


“Take any eleven albums for a penny (plus shipping and handling). Then take a twelfth one free!
If you join Columbia House Record and Tape Club and agree to buy 8 more selections (at regular club prices) in the next 3 years.” – ad

I had an old record player from J
C Penney’s. Fake wood exterior, thick
plastic stylus arm. It couldn’t play
those cheap-o Columbia house discs—
they were too light, the grooves were too shallow,
the needle would skip across. I didn’t
know this until I tried, of course. Like, who
makes records too thin to be played? I couldn’t
send them back because my record player
scratched them and anyway I was 16.
I knew they couldn’t sue me. Later
bills would come, I ignored them too. I mean
why should I pay when I couldn’t play? I
felt no guilt, hearing about their bankruptcy.